Sunday, August 31, 2008

i am my mother's child

why do shoes make me so happy?
i went to find nude heels

mission accomplished. seriously. MISSION accomplished.
a few of you understand what i mean by this. nude shoes. nude shoes. nude shoes. this changes everything.

Saturday, August 30, 2008

no other atmosphere

"Free love? As if love is anything but free! Man has bought brains, but all the millions in the world have failed to buy love. Man has subdued bodies, but all the power on earth has been unable to subdue love. Man has conquered whole nations, but all his armies could not conquer love. Man has chained and fettered the spirit, but he has been utterly helpless before love. High on a throne, with all the splendor and pomp his gold can command, man is yet poor and desolate, if love passes him by. And if it stays, the poorest hovel is radiant with warmth, with life and color. Thus love has the magic power to make of a beggar a king. Yes, love is free; it can dwell in no other atmosphere."

there is no anarchy in love. even for emma goldman

Wednesday, August 27, 2008

Tuesday, August 26, 2008

growing pains are underestimated

so sorry for the lack of posts. i've been so busy lately. and oddly enough, the more busy i am, the more things seem to have changed.

i knew in my heart that if i stayed true to who i was...things would work out. and they are..for the better. i like that things can go just the way you want them to without having to change yourself or without acting in a ridiculous way. that things can go your way and work out for truth, just by sticking to your principals and not lowering your standards - so long as, your standards and principals are those of a clear aim for what reality is...and past petty drama. i think that if you're truly doing whats right and whats best for you...this is the only outcome. my faithful readers, always remember, that no matter what - grace and truth are the things that will get you where you need to'll experience a lot of pain, you'll experience humiliation, and but in the end, you cut out the fake. It goes without saying that if you are straight up about everything you may seem like you're causing problems, but in the end, people will only realize that you were just trying to be honest and get an honest response in return.

a woman that i greatly admire used to say that every young lady should have three goals in life, to be a good wife, to be a good mother, and to never stop growing in wisdom. you can't get growth without pain...otherwise, you're just not working hard enough for it.

Monday, August 25, 2008


Happy - Jenny W/ The Watson Twins Lewis

I'd rather be lonely, I'd rather be free
I'm as sure as the moon rolls around the sea
But I like watching you undress
And I think we're at our best
By the flicker by the light of the TV set

Cause I can't remember why I hated you
Can't remember why I still do
But I'm as sure as the moon rolls around you
That I could be happy, happy
Oh, so happy, happy
Oh, so happy, so happy

They warn you about killers and thieves in night
I worry about cancer and living right
But my mama never warned me about my own
Destructive appetite

Or the pitfalls of control
How it locks you in your grave
Looking for someone to be saved under my restraint
So I could be happy, happy

Saturday, August 23, 2008


my friends are madd cute too.

Friday, August 22, 2008

Wednesday, August 20, 2008

its official

i'm doing it guys. my heart is there. and my heart is all i've got left.

Tuesday, August 19, 2008


momma. look how hot she is?!? i love her so much.
every opinion i have is because of her. she's the person i want to be when ... well, right now. i want to be her right now.

Monday, August 18, 2008

because you know this really happens..

Taken from HRO : Hipster Runoff


BangBusRider69 says:

Hi Carles,
On Friday I took a BoltBus from NYC to Boston, and I wound up sitting next to this girl with long brown hair and excellent bangs. Here are some things I observed about her during the 5 hours bus ride:
1. She was watching Planet Earth on her MacBook
2. At one point in the trip, she listened to an MGMT song on her iPod
3. She had a phone conversation with her friend about whether or not they should purchase Girl Talk tickets
4. She was carrying (though not reading) the new David Sedaris
I couldn't tell if she was legitimately cool or just a poseur. What do you think? Did I throw away an opportunity for a new best friend by not talking to her? Am I going to run into her at Don Hill's and will we have some awkward conversation about how we once sat next to each other on a bus?
You're the best.

Carles sayz:
She sounds like a pretty intense alt. The bottomline on girls like this is whether or not they are [HIGHLY TUGGABLE]. If they are attractive, it's good to have them as your friend. If they are 'kind of pretty' or 'ugly', they might be a decent friend for a while, but will ultimately be useless to you. (You will unfriend her one day). Any female can buy the Toolbox for becoming an 'Interesting Alt (Girl Edition)' or even 'an Alt Who Attracts Moderately Alternative Boys.' This isn't enough to mean she is good enough to be your best friend.

An interesting thing about alt-women is how insecure they are. Even if they are a kute girl, they always assume that the other girl in kute clothes . Ultimately, women are lonely, and want to identify with one another. This means they will force a connection and have a whimsical friendship that leads to hyping up the upcoming weekend via wall-to-wall posts. This will eventually end, and they will talk about how they never liked one another, and the other one only cared about fickle stuff like clothes, and music, and everything that they used to think made their friendship meaningful. Women r tough sometimes... wish they weren't so insecure and just wore their American Appy with pride."

Before you get offended, realize that HRO is semi-sarcastic. But if you think about it...its ironically, basically, true. I think that if they sold the "Interesting Alt (Girl Edition) Toolbox" it would fly off of the shelves.
[as long as it's mac compatible, of course.]


This is tacky. Stay home or don't wear heels OR a dress! its not that important.

Sunday, August 17, 2008

Saturday, August 16, 2008

you're gonna need your heart one day and you just don't have it


[ august 14 . 2008 : 10:22 pm ]

me: i thought you were dead
him: you might as well believe that i am
me: you have no heart.
him: you have no brain.
me: i'd rather have a heart than a brain


i recorded this video 8 months ago on my way home from thomas' house. i wanted to remember what it looked like whenever i drove that beautiful drive home. it was the same sunset i saw, every time i came home. when i knew the 4 hours away from each other meant skin and bones, and fighting, and not hearing from him. this video is incredibly personal to me, and for a while, when i missed him or when i thought things were really over, i would hold on to hope with this video and watch it just to remember every thing i felt going home, hoping and praying that i'd see the same sunset soon, as painful as my thoughts were during the drive, because it meant i was atleast coming home from being with him. ** i spent a majority of today cleaning things out and hitting the big re-set button on things. i don't need to be reminded of those feelings anymore, and i won't. i'm cleaning house and this video was one of the last things i found. it brought up a lot of mixed emotions, but it was more of a realization that i've moved on. i'm giving it to you to make something better out of it than what it now means to me. which is why this is the first and last time i'll ever talk about it. but how incredibly beautiful can a sky get for a girl that was so heartbroken? :)

ryan told me tonight that he was so proud of how much i've grown as a person since things have ended. and i agree. and i think its beautiful.

thank you, Lord, for knowing exactly when and how.


Friday, August 15, 2008

give yourself the green light

this picture rules all.
this summer ruled all.

oh, and we have found another destination for friday nights! i mean, i'll always love indie night, but as long as this goes on, i cannot.
goodbye tecktonik. i will never understand you, nor will i attempt to.

no one in france does this. trust me. i've been there.

Wednesday, August 13, 2008

Monday, August 11, 2008

girl(s) of summer. part 2.

lately i've been very inspired by pictures i've seen of my parents from the 1970s. Look.

i guess these "girls of summer" pics are a manifestation of that...

Sunday, August 10, 2008

girls of summer

[kelly mccan modeling for julia ramos photography ]

Friday, August 8, 2008


i am innn looove:

with the u.s. olympic team's outfits for the opening ceremonies by ralph lauren.

they look a little muted all together, though:

France's is funny lookin:

this weekends going to be great. i'm off till tuesday! hang outs hang outs hang outs

Thursday, August 7, 2008